Christmas is a time of year that can easily overwhelm all of us. It is often the case that our relationships are low on our priority list and during the Christmas season our spouse can land even lower. So how do you keep your partner as a priority when it makes sense to divide and conquer the many events, recitals, hosting obligations and financial obligations?
Relationships are more than the sum of its parts. Your relationship is an interaction between you and your partner. These interactions can be intentional or unintentional. When it feels like you and your partner are giving it your best effort and you still feel frustrated look to the pattern between you.
I am always searching for the beliefs that either put my clients on the path toward their goal or the one that impairs the client from reaching their desired outcomes. As a marital therapist this endeavor becomes more complex as two individuals in the relationship have unique perspectives about themselves, their partner and their mutual relationship.
As people process a betrayal there is often a point when they wonder aloud how they could be fooled so easily? Spouses say “I completely trusted my partner”. Yet as couples attempt to repair their relationship the next wondering that surfaces is “How can I trust my own judgment?”.